i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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