so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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