David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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