This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
