I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
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