i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
