Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
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