To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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