what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
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