Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
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