oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
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