Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
