sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize
