Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Randomize
