If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
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