with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
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