Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
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