Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
