he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
