I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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