I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Congratulations! We have a period
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
