Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
