Do vagina's smell?
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
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