Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Randomize