He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
