go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
