hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
