You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I AM VODKA MAN
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
