I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
