Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
