I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
