my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
