Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
We left the knife in your bed.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
