Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
this must be what syphilis tastes like
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
