she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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