he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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