if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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