I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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