He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Randomize
