so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
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