do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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