so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
