Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
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