11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Randomize
