My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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