You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Randomize
