My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Randomize
