ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
