haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
