i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Randomize
